Not a Love Story

Listen to me, I will tell you the truth about life. Stay with me, really. I am a master of magic.

Do you believe a man truly love a woman and constantly betray her? Never physically, but betray her in his mind. Men do it all the time. Do not worry, I am not running away from your questions. I will make you feel the painful beauty of a child the animal horniness of an adolescent male, the yearning suicidal moodiness of a young female.

And then of course, there is true love. It exists or else you bring it to existence. Is it worth its costs? And how about sexual fidelity? Does it work? Is it love? Is it even human? that perverse passion to be with only one person? And if it does not work, do you still get a bonus for trying?

Love is a tiresome childish business but don’t run away yet. I haven’t answered your question, have I?

Forget about love. I’ll tell you all the stretches of power. First the life of an indignant writer and a struggling middle class guy. Sensitive. Talented. May even some genius. Then I will show him as a cunning criminal having a time of his life at the expense of a sensitive girl who loved him dearly. Its out in the open now… his essential nature. No more kidding about his honor. The SOB is a hustler. A conniver. And then how he becomes an honest man once again. It is an awful strain being a crook. Nobody believes his honesty. His infidelity becomes his identity. So now, we have the poor struggling genius world. All this laced with plenty of sex, some complicated ideas you wont be hit over the head with. And I know you’re thinking… that conniving bastard is making me turn the page. Nevertheless, what… what is the harm? You’re having a good time, anyway.

When I was young, some women told me they loved me for my eyelashes.

I accepted.

Later it was for my wit. Then looks. Then for the man I wanted to be and then man I almost was. For my talent… my mind. I can handle all of it. The only woman who scares me is the one who loves me for myself alone. I have plans for her. I have poisons and daggers and dark graves in caves to hide her. She can’t be allowed to live. Let me being and let me end. I have played around your questions but I have answered at least two of them. Rest need more pages to black out… more thoughts to be penned. More lives to be scrutinized…

To be continued until then!

*********** sadly it was never continued.

“Yes you planned it right. You sucked my life out of me. I was a friend, I was the love you had written about. You just decided to kill me. You decided to move on”